It’s hard to believe that the trip is over so soon! In the past month God has stretched me, blessed me, and taught me so much! I had the expectation to be renewed by God and to be drawn closer to Him on this trip and He has done that but in a way I never expected!
When we started doing CI’s in Malaysia, I felt tired and really empty spiritually, but I thought that it would go away as I spent more time in God’s Word. Not so. In fact the emptiness lasted for two weeks and I wondered what was going on. I had never experienced this before and the strange thing was that nothing I tried seemed help. I would spend extra time in my devotions and prayer but it didn’t make a difference. I was giving out to the children each evening but felt so empty inside and I wondered how I could go on. Then one day as I was pouring out my heart to God, He made me realize that I was fighting Him. He wanted to draw me closer to Him THROUGH my emptiness and He had no intention of removing it right away. This was NOT what I was expecting to hear and at first I didn’t enjoy the thought but God showed me that the way He wants to draw me to Himself is not my way.
When I gave up and accepted the emptiness as a trial and that God would draw me to Himself through the it, He gave me a peace and a freedom that comes from resting in Him.
Doing CI’s with the team and being able to interact with the children has been such a blessing and it was so awesome to see how God met each one of our needs exactly on time and the way that He would get the most praise and glory! I thank Him for the opportunity to serve Him in this way and for those who have made CI possible this year! Thank you all for your prayers and support for the team. God bless you all!!
In Christ,
~Julia Beachy